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I would like to start the newsletter off first by telling someone I love with all of my heart how very important he is to me, and how much I love him. Happy Birthday Willy, you are the love of my life, and I am so happy to have you in my life. You truly make everything so worth living. ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((WILLY))))))))))))))))))))))))))) I Love You!!!!!
My Apologies:
My apologies for not sending out a newsletter in March, we have had a lot of things going on here at the house, and on the site. I hope this newsletter will make up for the one we didn’t get to do. It is packed full of new features, and nice things. I hope you enjoy it.
Special Announcement!!
We now have new chat software. We now have emoticons, sounds, and more options to rid us of those pesky problem users who do not have anything better to do than to harass people who have a life. LOL!!! ((((((((Chatblazer))))))))) YOU RAWK!!!!! If you are a site owner, and would like to have Chatblazer software for your site, please tell them Support4hope sent you. These people do not keep you waiting for tech support, when you send them a letter they are on it very quickly, and are very dependable. I give them a 10!!!!!!!!
Web Design Recommendation:
If you are a small business, large business, church, club, organization, doctor, lawyer, or just want your own personal web site to share with friends and family, check out a site we highly recommend for web design and affordable pricing. They offer Web Pages, Personal sites, Flash Design, Company Logos, Static, Animated, and Flash Banners and Flash movies. They also offer Special prices for Non-Profit Organizations. http://www.1stQualityWebDesigns.com Check it out, and tell your friends about it. You will not be disappointed!!
Check Out Our New Features!!!!!
Comments from our guests are being posted, if you have something you would like to say to the new visitors about our site, please send your comments in and we will review them for posting. To all of you who sent in a comment about us, thank you very much, and I hope you keep enjoying Support4Hope. It has been so wonderful getting to know all of you this past year. It has been a wonderful experience. This feature can be found at www.support4hope.com/comments.htm
Another New Feature:
We now have an editorial column, www.support4hope.com/editorial.htm here you will find a variety of thoughts, on various mental health issues. It can vary, from random thoughts, to something breaking in the news area of mental health.
We now have the Support4Hope Newsletter online you can read all of the past newsletters you were not subscribed to by visiting www.support4hope.com/newsletter.htm
We now have a direct feed from newspapers and magazines all over the country, on the latest in mental health news. You can read the latest news in the mental health field at www.support4hope.com/news.htm
We Have Two New Awards!!
While not feeling well due to a kidney infection, I really needed something to pep me up this past week. Things were going wrong left and right, and I was about ready to pull my hair out!! J And I received the following letter:
Congratulations!!......Your site definitely qualifies for the "Critical
Mass Award". A very nice site, excellent design, clever original graphics
& artwork, and your content is
informative, entertaining, presented well and easy to access. A worthy enterprise
and a positive contribution to the Web.
Thanks for helping make the Web a more interesting, useful and attractive place
to visit. I really enjoyed my visit to your site and will return again when
time permits J
Cheers!!!
The other award is the Orchid Award. J After the previous letter I received this letter:
Congratulations!! I am very proud to present the famous "Orchid Award for Page Excellence" award to you, in recognition of your hard work in the creation of such an excellent page. I think you have done an outstanding job on your site! This award has been redesigned for the new millennium and I am sure you will be proud to display it on your page! Your site will join the exclusive WINNERS LIST shortly.
Well, I have to admit, it sure does feel good to see someone come to our site, see the work we have put in to it, and give us a compliment such as this!! I wanted to share it with all of you. <smiling from ear to ear> We would love for you to see our award, so we have added it to our other awards, and it can be viewed at the top of the following page. http://www.support4hope.com/awards.htm Hope you like it as much as we do!!!
Fund Raiser:
Support4Hope has posted pictures of photo albums made by yours truly :) To raise funds to get our non profit status, and to pay other expenses for our site, if you would like to help by purchasing one, or to make a donation to a very good cause, please visit www.support4hope.com/albums.htm to find out how, or if you would like to make a donation, you may send your donations to the address below, or we NOW have a means of making donations online, using the secure service of Pay Pal, you can send a donation, or purchase an album by using a credit card, or online check. You can find the link to Pay Pal's security form on all the related pages on donations or ordering.
Support4Hope
c/o Debra Heath
PO Box 184
Deer Lodge, TN 37726
If you would like to make a donation "In Memory Of" a loved one, we will also construct a page, with a poem, picture, or both, whatever you would like on the page, for the person you have chosen.
Inspirational:
This recipe was sent in by a friend for the newsletter, I found it to be a very nice addition to our newsletter this time. I hope you do too.
1 cup greetings
1 cup handshakes
1/2 cup smiles
2/3 cups of love
1 tsp compassion
2 cups hospitality
Cream greetings with handshakes and smiles, thoroughly, and slowly. Stir in love. Sift compassion and hospitality together, and fold in carefully. Bake in a warm heart and serve as needed.
Testimonials:
If you have not taken a look at our testimonials, please do go look at them, they are quite inspirational, and if you have already seen them, please take a look again, we have added some new ones. If you would like to have your testimonial posted on our site, please feel free to send them to Willy at webmaster@support4hope.com and he will make sure they get posted with all of our other beautiful guests.
Dear Dee:
I came to Support4hope for advice on what to do about my girlfriend who was going through a disorder, and was just about to kill us all with giving up on things she wanted to do with her life, and you and the rest of support4hope was very supportive of me. You showed me a lot of things that I was doing wrong by catering to her, and trying to make things easier for her. I didn't realize that the more I was doing for her the less she was wanting to do for herself, and I was making things worse for her. At first I was mad at you all, and I expressed that in some of the things I said to all of you, because you all were telling me that she could do things on her own, but she was trying to use sympathy to get her way with things. I apologize to you all because that is exactly what she was doing. You all were right. I was doing things to be nice, but she was beginning to expect me to do it all the time, and it was becoming so bad that I was not having time to do things I was supposed to do. It haven't been to your site in awhile but by backing off and making her do the things she was supposed to do, I realize now that I am helping her. She got mad at me, but I told her that if I did it all she would never do it again. She agrees with me now, and she is thankful that I talked to you. I am sorry I said what I did to you that day, you really were trying to help me. She was feeling sorry for herself and expected everyone to do everything for her because she had a disorder. And you were right. She realizes now that she needed to get the right medicine and the right frame of mind to help her self. She is working at it and so am I. Thank you Support4hope for being here for people who are so confused and don't have no place to go. And thank you for not getting mad at me but you tried to make me understand what I was doing wrong. She is doing things to make her feel better about her self like you all suggested, and we are working on it together. I realize now that I can be there for her, without feeling sorry for her, and doing everything for her, but she has to do this on her own too. Sincere thanks, Robert
Dear Robert:
A lot of people after diagnosed forget they have a life. They are overwhelmed with the idea of having a disorder. And there are some who allow their disorder to control a lot of other people as well as themselves. That is what she was doing to you and to her. We have to move on with our lives, and realize that having a disorder isn't the end of the world, but with proper treatment, we can gain control of our lives again. But if someone is there to do everything for us, it WILL consume us. And I am glad you realized that, and moved forward from there.
I have seen so many times where people, even ones who do not have a disorder, allow pity, and wallowing to be part of their daily life. And demanding that you do this or that, because she had a disorder, and being allowed to verbally abuse you, just wasn't right. And if you tell her the truth, and express your true feelings when she said something hurtful to you, it made her think about what she was doing. It isn't fair that anyone else should suffer, simply because she was diagnosed with a disorder.
We could see your pain, and when we seen there was something you could do about it, we simply wanted to help you. Rob, I am so glad you are okay, and she is back on track. Good luck to you both, and keep that line of communication opened. It is always the best way of keeping a relationship fresh. :) (((((((((Rob)))))))))))
Hugs,
Dee
Coping Skills Survey:
We had a lot of feedback on the coping skills. I appreciate your time in responding.
1. A lot of people wrote in about prayer, and faith, to help them get through some of the toughest times in their lives. I think this is a wonderful outlook, and felt it needed to come first, for one reason in particular. One of the ladies who wrote in with a response gave me some of the good feelings back I thought I had lost forever when I lost my Grandparents. Thanks Lindy!
2. When you are so overwhelmed with racing thoughts, and feel as though you cannot cope, one suggestion is to go to a quiet place as soon as you possibly can and do deep breathing techniques. They also recommend talking to your therapist about visualization techniques and meditation for anyone who is suffering from manic episodes.
3. Walking on a nice day, listening to the birds singing, listening to what nature has to say to you helps a lot. Learning how to appreciate the natural things that are free have been forgotten in this day and time. Things have become so fast-paced we have forgotten how to stop, look around us, and try to remember what is given to us for free to enjoy.
4. When you start to think those negative thoughts, and concentrate on obsessions, and the like, remind yourself it is “the illness” taking over, and you DO have control over those thoughts. This person says he feels as though it takes the blame off of him, and allows him to see that these thoughts are not his own choosing. He feels the disease makes him feel the way he does, and it helps him to realize it isn’t real, and he overcomes the thoughts easier. He says he doesn’t feel so trapped by depression that way, and it gives him more control over his emotions.
5. One lady says she walks regularly for her physical as well as mental health. In the winter she feels she gets more depressed, because she doesn’t get to walk as often because of the cold, and she feels her body needs it to feel better. So she bought a treadmill for winter, and she highly recommends them. She started out small, and worked her way up to where she walks about fives miles a day. And if she is feeling more anxiety and stress she walks more, and that helps her to overcome a lot of mixed emotions. She walks off anger, as well as depression, and it makes her feel better.
6. A young gentleman says he centers his anger toward good and productive things. He works with wood and wooden crafts. His working with wood used to be a hobby, but now has become something he really enjoys, and makes money from it too, so it serves two purposes.
7. Another lady loves to work on quilts. She takes all of her children’s old clothes they do not want anymore, and cuts them into squares, and makes quilts. She gives them away for Christmas and birthdays, and again…that serves two purposes. Helps to think positively, because she is doing something positive, and she has something she can just open a drawer and pull out and wrap up if she forgets to get someone something for birthdays, anniversaries, or Christmas.
8. A lot of people wrote in with breathing techniques, when you feel as though you are going to have a panic attack, try to find a calm place, if that is impossible, try to listen to your breathing, try to slow it down by listening. In through your mouth, out through your nose slowly. Think of something calming. If you have any music that is slow and calming put it on.
9. Speaking of calming music, I, myself use nature sounds to help me calm from a panic attack. My favorite is one that has ocean waves and soft saxophone. I also love the sound of rain. Sitting in the porch and listening to the rain falling on the grass is so relaxing. A lot of people like to listen to Opera, the symphony I guess it is up to the individual what relaxes them.
10. One lady says to focus on things that are relaxing to you. Have key chains made with pictures of your children, spouse, girl/boyfriend whatever the case may be. When you are feeling anxious concentrate on those pictures.
11. Music boxes were suggested as a way of relaxing when you are having a panic attack. Wind your music box, and concentrate totally on the music.
12. A lot of people suggested stress balls. Especially people who are in an office, and cannot just get up and walk, or listen to relaxing music. They have really neat ones now, with those little beans in them, you can just pull that sucker out when you are anxious, and need to relax.
13. Some suggested counting as a way of calming down when they are feeling anxiety attacks coming on.
14. Writing down what is bothering you, sometimes discussing what is bothering you is something you might not want to do. So writing down exactly how you feel is a good way of being honest with yourself, and being able to release anger without hurting feelings.
15. Last and certainly not least, everyone who knows Dee…KNOWS I am going to put this in here…LOL. I highly suggest shoe-shopping…LOL!!!! I do not know why, but when I am upset, and feeling like I just want to scream, I can go find a pair of high-heeled shoes I like, and it makes me feel better. It could be because I have done something for myself. That is another thing I highly recommend…do something for your self. Pamper yourself a little. Even you men out there, who feel you do not do enough for yourself. Go out and buy that golf club you have been wanting, or the CB you have been wanting…do something for yourself for a change. Everyone deserves a little pampering every once in a while.
Something to remember:
I received a letter from a young man who was having problems in school because of a disorder he is suffering from. He trusted his best friend to keep a secret, and told him he had a disorder, and his best friend went around telling everyone, and now he is being taunted, made out to be “crazy” and a “freak” by the other children in school, and now he is not wanting to go back to school, because of the embarrassment, these children, who were once his friends, are causing him to go through. I will not go into any more detail with name, etc. I just think something needs to be said in his defense.
What kind of society are we living in, when children are being put through this in school? When kids are allowed to make fun of other children, simply because they are different, and obviously something he really cannot help, what is this child going to end up becoming?
How in the world could a child possibly be able to gather any sort of self-esteem when he is being exposed to this? He is already avoiding school, because of what others are saying about him. If your child has a disorder, please talk to her/him, and try to keep a line of communication opened at all times for discussing situations such as this one.
This little boy obviously hadn’t talked to his parents about it, because he came to me with it. Do not be afraid to ask your child what he or she is fee